creativity breaks and diets

There's been a mix of events lately, I feel like both nothing and everything has happened since I last posted. For one, I attempted painting again, early last week. I painted over one of my smaller paintings and ended up with something I was pretty happy with (balloons!). I then tried to paint over the pumpkins and thus began the waterworks. I just couldn't work it out, everything I did ended up looking terrible and ridiculous. It was so bad that even Tim had no words..how embarrassing. This is what I'm talking about, people; these are the terrible, embarrassing moments that make me cringe and want to never attempt art again. The night ended with me in tears and Tim trying to make me believe that he has made some pretty terrible art himself (I'll never believe it, unless he considers his art from 3rd grade 'terrible'). And so, I put away my paints and canvases for a little bit in order to allow myself to refuel my creativity.

Here's my balloon painting that I did before the pumpkin canvas disaster!


On another note, I decided that it was time to really focus on losing weight. As you can see in my weight ticker on the top of my page, I've already started. I'm reluctantly spending more money at ShopRite each week, purchasing a plethora of Weight Watchers items so that I am less tempted to stray. So far I guess I can say that I've been doing...okay. I'm still having a little trouble really focusing on my efforts and sticking to it. I've been able to turn down most temptations, but hey, no one's perfect. My goal is to lose around 10lbs by my birthday, October 5th. That gives me about 7-8 weeks from the start of this endeavor. I can do this.



This is the weight I aspire to - however, I'm not quite sure how I was EVER this skinny, I feel like my bones alone are larger than I was in this picture, so I don't know how I'll ever get there again. Not just that, I'm pretty sure Tim would suffer from depression from those tiny boobs I had! Haha.


It feels like fall is quickly on it's way. You won't hear me complain about that, however, I have no fall-friendly clothes. I was never good with fall/winter clothes because I just hate jeans. I would wear dresses and skirts my whole life if I could, but living in Philadelphia, it's not really an option. I think I'm going to have to go out and pick up a few things, work and casual. I am so terrible at fashion that it's embarrassing. I'm goofy and awkward and I'm not daring at all when it comes to what I wear. I don't like this about myself, but I fear it's a reality that I'm not sure I can break the mold of. This is another reason I'm focusing on losing weight, other than weddings and dinners and birthdays. Now that I work in a place where I have to wear nice clothes, I want to be able to actually wear nice clothes, and not nice fat-girl clothes. Ha. We'll see.